shut up and LISTEN

I have been beaming at all the Vanessa jokes cracked by the media so I have decided to collect them - with some help from some of you because Vanessa jokes along with Nate jokes are the BEST. EVER!

Pre-graduation, Videotaping Vanessa walks up to Nepotism Nate (who's chatting up his gramps), and they catch up in a friendly way--he's starting his internship soon, his grandfather and mother are on speaking terms again, he and Blair broke up, and he apologizes for how horribly he handled things with V. Since nothing is ever new with Vanessa and Nate really was a douche recently, she thanks him for all that stuff forever ago that guided her toward NYU, and Nate then invites V and D to his post-graduation party.
BUDDY TV!!!!

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Of course, Nate went straight back to Vanessa after Blair dumping him. Some men just need a woman, and Man Bangs is one of them. Remember when he was sleeping in a sleeping bag in his basement? Mmm-hmm. Plus 2.

And of course, Vanessa would take him back, because, please: Brooklyn girl's facing down an army of Aaron Roses out there. Naturally she's going to want to rise through the golden wave of those bangs to another, better place. Plus 1.
Intel

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Vanessa and Nate are going backpacking through Europe, after all! Wow, this show is really determined to keep Vanessa around. (:D)Not only is she going to NYU, too – does slinging coffee pay well enough to afford that kind of tuition? – but now she’s Nate’s vacation buddy again. With benefits, we assume. Could the show have found a lamer way to get Nate out of his internship at the mayor’s office? The deputy mayor hit on him so he quit? Good grief. A sloppy way to reunite him and Vanessa, and a sloppy way for him to prove that he’s not a man-whore, dammit!
LoHud

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Oh, and Nate finally joins Vanessa on that goddamn trip around the world just to shut her up. Do we know where Vanessa's going to college? Do we care? And when is her batshit sister showing up?
Jacob whom we are still mad at, you sympathist

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The Real Round table:

Vanessa going to NYU came out of nowhere, though I guess they had to keep her around somehow.

Vanessa: She who magically appears without explanation.

Nate: Spend less time man whoring and more time working on facial expressions.

Season 3: Vanessa will perfect her iced mocha latte technique. Vanessa will never return from her camping trip (hey, we can all dream).

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And... um... Vanessa...? Wait. Why do you keep showing up to random places that you don't belong? Why are you here?

Why is Vanessa ever anywhere? (LIKE IN FUCKING DOVE COMMERCIALS??)
Gawker <3

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What about Nate--now that he and Blair broke up, what is keeping him from holing up at Columbia and never reemerging? Oh yeah, Vanessa. If she counts as a reason (survey says no).
Aftergasm - Buddy TV

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You see? I didn't even have to say a word. Just copy/paste. :D